December 2023. My mom’s Christmas wish was simple yet profound: “To feel normal and not dizzy.”

The past three years have tested her strength—and mine. Surviving a second heart attack, an aortic valve replacement, and a stroke is no small feat. Thankfully, my parents moved in with my husband and me 14 years ago, so we already had the logistics in place to support her through it all.

Stepping into caregiving wasn’t entirely new for me. Years ago, I spent a few weeks helping my aunts care for my grandmother, and those lessons came rushing back when I began looking after my mom. The learning curve has been steep, but it’s also strengthened our family bonds, reshaped my perspective, and shifted my role from child to caregiver.

Immediately after her stroke, she needed our help more than ever—ensuring her medications were managed, helping her get out of bed and to the bathroom, keeping her spirits up, and watching carefully for any signs of distress or setbacks.

Her wish for ‘normalcy’ reminded me how helpless we can feel while doing our best for our loved ones. I started out wanting to “fix”, and over time I had to learn how to “flow” with what was in front of me.