Once I realized the gravity of my mom’s conditions, the next step was clear: become her advocate at every doctor’s visit. Here’s how that shift happened.

When Mom and I first visited her cardiologist together, I came armed with a notepad and a thousand questions. I wanted to get the full picture—what exactly should we be on the lookout for? How would we know if her condition was getting worse? And seriously, what did all these medications actually do?

That’s when I learned there’s no cure for aortic valve stenosis (when calcification messes with how the heart valve works). Her cardiologist told us that the only real solution is to keep an eye out for signs of heart valve failure so she can get a replacement in time. According to the doctor, regular physical activity and a healthy diet can help us catch red flags early, before things take a serious turn.

In that moment, I realized one of my biggest roles would be showing up at appointments—pen in hand—ready to absorb the details for her and stay in the loop. It is no longer just about driving her there; it’s about translating medical jargon, listing out things the doctor wanted her to do in between appointments, asking follow-up questions, and making sure neither of us leaves feeling confused.

Navigating doctor’s appointments was one thing—encouraging my mom to stay active was another beast entirely. Raise your hand if you’ve been there! Next, I’ll share how I learned to balance gentle nudges and respecting her preferences.

Do you attend medical appointments with your loved ones? What strategies help you stay organized and ask the right questions?